Monday, August 24, 2009

Letter to You.

Dearest Dad,

This is one of such thoughts that never come to my mind, I choose not to think of it, it does not even bother me anymore because it is the past. I hear stories that relate to what you dealt with in life but for the peace of God, I do not cringe or even nurse the emotions that come with it. I woke up today feeling all blue, knowing that if you were here, life would have been so much better. Why is it today that I am letting this get me? I fear that I am not all I need to be because I just have a mother who juggles between the two occupations of dad and mum.Why didn't you stay? God gave us authority over snakes and scorpions, and to overcome all the powers of the enemy, you taught me all this but you did not demonstrate it.

Six years ago, Long....painful....stressful....emotional....discouraging six years ago, four days after my birthday, I did not get a birthday call because you were recieveing chemo by that time but instead I got a call to say it was all over, earth couldn't just handle you anymore, you opressed everyone didn't you? you lost your battle with brain cancer. How could you? You forgot how to walk, it killed me inside to see my own father learning to walk again like a toddler but I had to maintain composure and be strong for you. You forgot how to talk, I could not longer have conversations to full lenght with you without you saying something that had no meaning whatsoever. I had to walk behind you when you wanted to go upstairs just to ensure you did not fall back as you were not balanced in your brain activity. You did not know how to feed yourself, your brain could not cordinate your hand to hold a fork up to your mouth, but you insisted on feeding yourself because you were a fighter. There were days when you would look at me but your eyes were crossed, tears will flood my eyes but i would hold back.You were absent on my primary school graduation, Your presence was not there at my High school graduation, now at University, it would be mum and everyone else but who will I jump on and scream 'DADDY, I MADE IT!' to?......sigh**, Who would walk me down the aisle and give my hand to him who deserves your treasure? I remeber when I would hold your hands while I lay on your bed with you, It made me peaceful. The doctors said you would not live more than 3 months after being diagnosed with cancer, shame on them, You made it to three years because you're a 'G' like that. I love you SO much, i know mummy misses you more but she is strong, you taught all of us lessons that will never go away.

We love you and miss you. I am trying to be who you would want me to be. It's really a hard journey but I am strong, You taught me not to give up and so fight I must!. You are in my heart, today, tomorrow and forever, No one will ever play 'daddy' more than you did. My heart goes out to you. Peace!

Your daughter,


Random fact:
~The reason why honey is so easy to digest is because it has already been digested by a bee.


  1. aww

    im so sorry about your dad
    but it'l be ok, it will all turn out fine...
    it is well :)

  2. You'll be fine Ebony. I know He's watching over you. Nice post!!

  3. In my humble opinion, your dad must be pretty proud with the person you are and are aspiring to be. That's the thought that struck me while reading your post;)

  4. I'm deeply moved by this. You're dad fought a good fight and I'm sure he'd be so proud of you. Even if he cant hold your hand physically, he'll be up there, looking down at his treasure

  5. Gosh, you had me tearing up. I'm so so sorry for your loss. May God continue to strengthen your family. Ah, cancer..the bitch of bitches..

  6. oh my goodness. i am so sorry about your dad, you are a strong lady ebony. i know he is already proud of you...

  7. Thanx everyone! For the compliments, the sympathy and commending who I am becoming! I appreciate. :) I feel much lighter than i did this morning though!

  8. ..but who will I jump on and scream 'DADDY, I MADE IT!'

    Deeply moved sounds like an understatement for your loss.I'm touched and my heart is broken for you but i know God, being who he is,will always comfort you and your family and play the role, the empty spot your dear father couldnt wait to fulfill..

    It is well with you..

  9. awwww thanks alot! BTW i can't go to your blog I wonder why. God is faithful and we dare not question Him. Thanx alot. I really appreciate!

  10. Oh really..Thanks for the interest..


  11. I had tears in my eyes at the end. May God continue to console your family.

  12. I'm sure he's in a better place resting and smiling down on you! Just thank God for the chance to have known him and allow his memories to live on in your heart!

  13. hey have turned your pain to strength, to be able to do that requires an enourmous amount of grace and favor from God.

    this shows that you have both and even more. God's on your side (since He's for you who can be against you?) and Him being thr GREAT COMFORTER will forever comfort you...

    FACT: God pays special attention to widows and children who have lost their fathers (i don't want to quote the bible) so be rest assured that you have extra special attention from Him.

    Keep being strong and your testimony shall be great!!! GOD BLESS...

    this was really touchin btw

  14. wow...this piece was so touching. take heart oh.

  15. Sorry to hear about your loss hon. Keep making him proud!

  16. Thanx Guys! I really appreciate it. :) David I really appreciate and I know He loves me! Miss fab. Il kip trying to make him proud. Love you all!

  17. We have all been told that everything happens for a reason and although the are circumstances we can not explain, what brings us hope is that we believe it was their time to go..
    I am so sorry for your loss..But for every sorrow there is joy at the end..
    There is no doubt what so ever that you have already made him proud and that u will continue to do so in every aspect of your life..

  18. :)thanx alot love! i really hope i haave nade him proud! it's my hearts desire.


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